The jury in Alvarro Castillo's trial heard excerpts Wednesday from his journal in which Castillo detailed his planned suicide and obsession with the shootings at Columbine.

"My parents will be shocked and heartbroken, but I will still do it," Castillo wrote in his journal on March 31, 2006.

Castillo also wrote about how he could no longer live in a world that was so sexualized and in which women are treated poorly.

He wrote about how he wanted to use the same gun Eric Harris and Dylan Kleibold, the two Columbine High School shooters, used in their massacre and suicide.

The investigator who questioned Castillo after the shooting at Orange County High School took the stand on Wednesday.

Castillo, 22, of Hillsborough was arrested in August 2006 after police said he opened fire at Orange High in Hillsborough. Shortly after his arrest, investigators said Castillo told authorities he killed his father before coming to the school.

Orange County investigator Rick Smith was in the same police car Castillo was placed in after the shooting. Smith said Castillo was upset, agitated and fidgety.

"I was trying to calm him down and basically he said he was wanting to die and kept talking about a sacrifice," Smith testified Wednesday.

"He tried to put his head around the seatbelt and trying to wrap the seatbelt around his neck and kept pulling. I reached and pulled it around his shoulder so he couldn't get it around his neck."

Smith said he spoke with Castillo for several hours in the car and at the Sheriff's Office. Smith had about three pages of notes from the conversation.

James Williams, Castillo's attorney, quoted Smith's notes. Castillo allegedly told Smith, "I love my guns. I slept with them last night."

Smith testified Castillo admitted to killing his father at 11 a.m. the day of the shooting.

"[Castillo] said that his father was dead and he said he saw the blood explode out of his head ... said he had seen his dad reading the paper and shot him four or five times. He wanted him dead for the sake of his mother and sister."

Castillo has pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity to several charges, including first-degree murder.

Stay with NBC17 and MyNC.com for the latest updates on the trial.


Read More:

Accused Gunman: ‘He Won't Hurt Anyone Again' (08/04/09)

Attorney: Castillo "Depressed, Psychotic" At Time Of School Shooting (08/03/09)